How to Be a Broadway Star

I was listening to Seth Rodetsky on Sirius' Broadway station (I think it was Seth), and he was saying that a lot of his friends who have seen Christina Applegate in "Sweet Charity" are remarking that she can't sing. I'm not going to argue the point even though her singing was fine by me, but HELLO! Have these people listened to Broadway legends like Ethel Merman and later Angela Lansbury? A great singing voice has never been a prerequisite for Broadway stardom. This hypothesis was proved again when I heard Gertrude Lawrence sing "Hello, Young Lovers." "The King and I" was written specifically for the woman, but her voice? Not so hot. Listen to a big star like Ray Bolger sing "Once in Love with Amy." Again, not so hot. Even worse, listen to him talk his way through "Once Upon a Time" with an occasional failed attempt to hit a note on pitch. I won't even bring up performers like Rex Harrison who didn't bother to try to sing.

I admit that in general a dancer must really be able to dance on Broadway. But look at Chita Rivera, one of the two or three greatest dancers in the last half century. Love her, adore her, worship the ground she highkicks on. Then, they gave her a tailor-made role in "Kiss of the Spider Woman," but her best days as a dancer had passed so they had to choreograph around her in the more difficult moments. Exact same story goes for Gwen Verdon in "Chicago."

Did I not enjoy those shows? I loved them all. Why? Because a Broadway performer does not always have to sing well or dance well. They have to entertain us. Granted, many times they entertain us because of their exciting skills at singing or dancing, but plenty of performers thrill us with less than perfection.

So all I can say about Christina's performance is that I had a great time seeing the show, and I really didn't find any reason to put down her singing or dancing. (I know, I know, some of the critics are going to say that they just didn't find her entertaining whether she can sing and dance or not. They're entitled to their opinions, but I disagree.) So give the girl, who -- don't forget -- usually gets great reviews for her comic acting, a break.

By the way, if by some bizarre, unimaginable circumstance you hear of this blog entry, Christina, we actually had a brief encounter once. When you had your restaurant in West Hollywood, I was having dinner with a friend on the very dark upstairs patio and said to him, "You know, Christina Applegate owns this restaurant." The person near me at the next table said, "Yes, and she's sitting right here." I looked over and there you were opposite her. I mumbled an apology and said hi. In my defense, it was very dark and your hair was red! LOL! Anyway, congrats on your Broadway debut.